Disappointment with God

This is a post I wrote that appeared in our local rag. Some may be wrestling with this issue right now, so I thought I would post here if you wanted to read.

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Perhaps you are reading this and you feel like God has treated you unfairly right now. When you pray it feels like you are talking to a wall. Your most urgent prayers get no answer. God seems silent. You’ve asked him for something and He just won’t give it to you. Your career, maybe your marriage, maybe your body is in trouble. Or maybe it’s just the mundane that bothers you: your work is boring; your marriage isn’t what it could be; the bills keep stacking higher and you just seem to be working longer.

You may conclude that God seems to be unfair when He has the power to do what you want, but He doesn’t. Or perhaps you have concluded that there is no God, because life is just too hard. Or maybe you’ve concluded that God is an impersonal force because you don’t think your prayers get beyond the ceiling.

What should we do when we feel disappointed with God?

Disappointment with God in the Bible

The Bible is full of examples of people who were disappointed in God. In fact, throughout the Old Testament, the people of God continually express their disappointment with God. The song-lyrics book of the Bible, Psalms, sums up the despair of the person who trusts in God:

Psalm 13:1 How long, O LORD? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me?

Some of the Old Testament prophets felt as though they were wrestling with the silence of God:

Isaiah 45:15 Truly you are a God who hides himself, O God and Savior of Israel.

Habakkuk 1:2 How long, O LORD, must I call for help, but you do not listen? Or cry out to you, "Violence!" but you do not save?

If you are disappointed with God then you are in good company.

Types of Questions we ask when Disappointed with God

There are 2 types of questions we ask when we are disappointed with God.

The first question is the "why" question: "Why did this happen?"

There is a bloke in the Bible called Job. He lost his kids, his house, his health. The only thing he didn’t lose was his wife, and she told him to curse God and die! He said to God:

Job 7:20b Why have you made me your target? Have I become a burden to you?

These may be your questions:
· Why did the Victorian bushfires happen?
· Why did my marriage fail?
· Why did my child die?
· Why did ....... ? (I'm sure you can fill in the blank)

But there's another question which is even more chilling than the "why" question. It is the “where” question. "Where is God" when all this terrible stuff is happening? Consider Job:

Job 23:2-4 Today also my complaint is bitter; my hand is heavy on account of my groaning. 3 Oh, that I knew where I might find him, that I might come even to his seat! 4 I would lay my case before him and fill my mouth with arguments.

Job wanted to know where God was. Our questions might be:
· Where was God when my wife’s body was full of cancer?
· Where is God now that my Dad has died?
· Where was God on 9-11?

All you are left with is the whisper of the devil who says: “God is not there! You are all alone, and God doesn't care!” Have you ever felt like that?

How to Handle Disappointment with God

We can handle disappointment with God in wrong ways and right ways.

Wrong Ways
We can:
-Ignore God: Silence becomes our weapon of defence against God. We avoid church and avoid the people of God like a rash.
-Focus on Self: Pain has a tendency to make us introspective and distort our vision.
-Perform: We may think that if I pray more, attend church or do good things, God will look kindly on me and owe me one.
-Take shortcuts: We do this to avoid pain. We turn to alcohol or porn or the workshed to avoid the pain.
-Make demands on God: As though God is our butler to do our bidding, we demand that God proves Himself to us.

Right Way
When disappointed, there is only one way to respond. It’s simply to trust in God. Disappointment doesn’t have to be the last word. The important battle is: will you trust God? When faith is the hardest, that’s when faith is needed most. Again, consider Job. During his terrible suffering, Job had trust in God:

Job 13:15 Though he slay me, yet will I hope in him; I will surely defend my ways to his face.

Trust which is the result of having been shaken is strong trust.

Am I asking for blind trust? NO! It’s a trust in God that isn’t based on circumstances.

God uses circumstances to develop our trust in him. Circumstances are not our enemy, they are our friend. God knows what it takes to make us more like Jesus. There are no perfect circumstances to follow Christ except the ones you are in today. These are the ones God has given you to develop you.

Romans 8:28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

God is good no matter what the circumstance. That’s why you can agree with the writer of Psalm 42.

Psalm 42:5 Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.

Some Things to Remember

a) Don’t Trust in a Perfect Earth
Sometimes we think that God is not fair because life is not fair. We think physical reality equals spiritual reality.

But that’s a wrong conclusion. God’s love for you does not depend on your good wealth and health. That’s staking your faith on a perfect earth. If you do that, your faith will always let you down.

God’s love for us depends on what he has done through Jesus.

Romans 5:8 But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

God loves you beyond your wildest dreams. So learn to develop a relationship with God apart from your circumstances. (Read Hebrews chapter 11- it’s full of men of faith who hung onto God despite their circumstances).

b) Count Your Blessings
The heart that is thankful is the heart that isn’t disappointed. Are we to give thanks in some circumstances?

1 Thessalonians 5:18 Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.

So count your blessings, name them one by one.

c) Focus on the Big Picture
When you get disappointed with God, you get trapped in the present. We need to see the big picture and fix our gaze ahead to the future.

If you think God has been unfair to you, you haven’t seen the big picture. For one day, God will conquer evil and restore this world to its original perfection. In the end, suffering won’t win.

Do you know what the last word is? Heaven.

In the new heavens and new earth God won’t be hidden any more. You will see him face to face. Heaven and earth will finally work the way God wanted it to.

So when you are trapped in pain there is one word you need to remember- temporary.

d) God Knows Pain Too
We want a God who knows what it’s like to be human, to feel our pain. The cross settles the issue of is God unfair. Our God is unwilling to put his children through any test which he Himself has not endured. God understands what you feel. He too is acquainted with grief.

Isaiah 53:3 He was despised and rejected by men, a man of sorrows, and familiar with suffering.

God is not hidden. He is there. He loves you. He has given the best proof of this love by sending His Son.